Hi everyone! Barney here. Something happened to me on the subway the other day that got me to thinkin', and that that is never a good thing. So here goes: this blog's first official rant!
Reading is not just for dorks and four-eyes. Many people can enjoy it, especially those who, say, have never been near a TV. There are countless benefits to being literate as well. Archeologists know that opening a sarcophagus marked "Curse of Hemorrhoids" is probably a bad idea. Men know that any girl with a tramp stamp that says "sure thing" and an arrow pointed downwards is probably worth double-bagging it. Reading is also a useful skill if you want to delve into the
wide, wonderful world of books. Books are tomes of knowledge that contain information on subjects of the author's choosing. Some books will guide you safely through a zombie apocalypse. Others are written by Jane Austen and were not intended to have zombies in them at all. Some books are useful. Others have pictures of boobs. As I said, useful. Others can be of no use at all. Math books, dragon porn, and James Joyce fall into the latter category. But of all the books in the world that attempt to teach you valuable information, fantasy novels are among the least effective. They take place in magical realms named Glamorgschlia and Squbboobussiblesssssss. They have characters that carry impossibly large swords and messiah complexes to match. More importantly, some have hot elf chicks. Many of these books are very, very shitty...
