Peter picks Pam's poncho pocket
Howard eats Dale's bread
Steven snakes the drain, twas stuffed with
Hair from Mary's head
Billy bathes with Bob's new soap
Nathan picks Nick's nose
Tyson's left trips Tommy's right and
Hannah hikes her hoes
Ellie "eeks!" at egg-yoke eyeballs
Izzie "icks!" her itch
Richard "roars!" at Izzie's rash and
Labels her a "bitch!"
Terms are tossed and slang is slung
And words like dick n' crotch n' bung
Then slapping starts and blasting farts
And wicked wacky taco sharts
And raging rapid kicks amid
The fetid tepid rancid squid did
Nothing to the throbbing id
That they themselves would e'er forbid
A clusterfuck is what it's called
A tangle of aggression
There's no hope left for love not war
Not even one exception
These roommates are forever doomed
To scream and shout and yell
There's too much fighting in their past
They have no chance in hell
But Hannah proves to be the key
She stops her fists from flying
Not cuz she's losing, no she's tough;
But cuz her panty's tearing
She takes her hoes off then and there and
Sees her legs are blander
Than her face and, yes, the space
Between her tits aren't tanned or
Touched upon by color, no
There's nothing there to gander
Surely she's no chance in hell of
N'er the slightlest pander
But as she starts to cry she runs her
Hands along her thigh
All the men, so locked in battle
Stop and turn an eye
And then the second eyes do look
The firsts will not be loners, and
Following the sudden hush comes
Boinging of their boners
Hannah sees their slack-jawed stares
She knows that on they're turned
Because of her! oh yes, it's the
Attention she's so yearned
The fighting stops, their hands are shook
Their differences they shuck
They turn to one another and they
Hit the floor and fuck.
They wake up late the following day,
All smiles and quite a'sweaty
And then the ladies slap their heads;
They don't have any Plan-B
Oh shit, they say, that was quite dumb;
It's no exaggeration,
Because there is a likely chance
They spawned the next gen'ration.
eew!
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